Sea Monkey mayhem and a jar of pickles
2004-02-10 - 9:18 a.m.
You know you have to be some kind of major loser when you fail at raising Sea Monkeys. They didn't even hatch! I followed the directions. I put the packet of salt in the water. I put the little freeze dried eggs in the water. I waited 48 hours. And NOTHING. Well, no all the eggs were floating at the top. I waited 72 hours. Still nothing. I was getting all excited about showing my kids how magic and powerful I was by creating LIVE Sea Monkeys. By the end of the week all I had to show them was a clear vase with what looked like Cockroach poop floating around the top. And a slightly pungent odor. No Sea Monkeys. Maybe I shouldn't have kept trying to mix them around with my dirty little fingers. Stupid brine shrimp. You don't even LOOK like Sea Monkeys anyway. Pffft.
So I finished "I Know This Much Is True". An excellent book. I stayed up until 1:30 am to finish it. I think I will take your advice Tania and read "Come Undone" but I have to order it and wait. Sigh. Till then I guess I'll read "The Da Vincci Code" and see what all the bru-haha is about. Did I spell that right? Is it even a real word? I think it is. After all I got me some smarts real good. (word to my mutha)
I am currently wearing a Golds Gym brand plastic suit. It's like wearing a couple of big trash bags. I am my own personal suana and boy am I excited*. I am going to just sweat off the pounds in no time and then put on a bikini and pose for Stuff magazine. OK maybe I'll put on a one-piece with a lil skirt on it and model for Just My Size. Either way, I'm gonna look good! You all realize I am just being funny? But I really do have the plastic suit on.
I was reading a tabloid magazine Glen brought back from the states and there before me was a slimmed down Anna Nicole who dropped 80 pounds from weighing 230. And that did I tell you. If that ding dong of a woman can do it, Damned if I can't. So I bought a jar of dill pickles, donned the plastic suit and BAM! I am ready! Just give me a few months OK? Or not. I will still love me. Know why? Because I have Charisthma. :)
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Under the WTF?!!? files - 2008-03-07