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They Call Me P.B.
2004-09-30 - 8:21 p.m.

For those of you who wanted to know, yes you can call me Pumpkin Butt, and not just because it smells all nice and cinnamon-pumpkin-spicy. It�s also silky smooth too. Really it is just an extension of my nickname my mom gave me when I was a roly-poly baby. She called me Love Pumpkin. Ok, so she still calls me that. And�and, and, and..my butt is quite large and pumpkin-y shaped at the moment. It is almost October (my favorite month) so call me Pumpkin Butt. I�ll dig it.

Speaking of pumpkin-shaped butts, I bought my dress for the Ball this year. If you remember from last year, the Marine Ball is held every November and us women get to pretend like it�s prom. I never went to my prom and last year was my first ball. I felt like a princess for that one night. Well, this year it falls on my birthday, my 33rd to be exact. I have had some pretty sucky birthdays the past couple of years so this year is extra special. I have been having these nightmares about not having a dress for the ball especially because they don�t really cater to my size here and it is about 3 to 4 hundred euro for a gown here.

Anyway, I went online and found some dresses I really liked. I am a tomboy and have no real sense of style but they were ball gowns (it said so on the page) and I thought they were perrdy. One in particular was silver and had spaghetti straps and is a one piece but looks like 2 pieces with a big puffed out skirt. It reminded me of Cinderella. I was just about to get it when somebody who meant to be helpful only ended up cutting into my insecurities. I suddenly felt like I was going to be this big fat slob in a big ass ball gown and people might stare or laugh (I�m a size 16/18 up from a 12). I thought I�ll look ridiculous and I started moping over stupid �mother of the bride� dresses for old ladies but they�d at least cover up my unsightly bulge.

Before anyone groans at me, I mulled it over for a day and changed my mind. It will be my night dammit. It�s a full length dress, not sleazy or tasteless. It�s pretty and sparkly and what I wanted. For anyone who is curious you can see it here http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=5325204944. I am also going to wear a little tiara for my �party hat�. It�s only for one night so hey, what the hell. I�m going to live it up and pretend I�m Cinderella of the ball, pumpkin butt and all.

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